How Parents Play A Decisive Role In Developing EQ Among Children!
As I pen down this topic, I look back at about twelve years of parenting. I have grown older and more mature with my kids and over the years, I have learned to balance my emotions. I remember being a paranoid new mom and an overly concerned one. Then the focus shifted to make my child the best in everything. I put so much pressure on myself and my kid that both of us would remain stressed. I reached a point where I realised that this could not sustain. My child refused to even go for any hobby classes.
This is when I decided to step back and stop being an aggressive mom. We may not realise it, but we as parents have a vital role in the emotional development of our kids.
Parents can help their children learn to express feelings through instructing, modelling, and guiding them in applying the skills of emotional management. As a parent, helping children with their feelings can help them feel better and reduce behaviour problems. Children who are able to manage their emotions often experience more positive feedback from others and are more successful in everyday life.
Learn To Manage Your emotions As A Parent
As you would have understood from my story, a lot of issues emerge because we as parents can’t keep a tab on our expectations and go overboard with them. So be conscious about how you handle your emotions in front of your kids if you want them to get a handle on theirs. A few things you can do to present an optimistic outlook in life are to stay positive, learn to relax and handle stress. What you portray in your behaviour is what your kids will pick up as well.
Be sensitive to your child’s feelings
Learn to manage your child’s emotions and feelings. Observe his/ her reaction and only give advice when he or she is receptive. Learn to listen and also observe your child. Your child should be able to freely express his/her feelings to you. Also, learn to accept negative emotions from your child. After all, your child is a growing human being. Be supportive when he/she child is emotionally stressed out.
Provide them with the right nutrition
Optimal mental and emotional growth is not possible without providing the brain what it needs. This is especially important during the years when children go through maximum brain growth. Certain nutrients which are especially important may not be sufficiently absorbed from a regular diet. Ever since I got to know about the importance of Docosahexaenoic acid (DHA), I have started giving my child a daily dose of Enfagrow A+ with a glass of milk. Along with DHA, this product provides a number of other nutrients my child needs for overall physical and mental growth. The product has been specifically made to serve the nutritional needs of those above 2 years of age.
Help Them Understand and Express Emotions
Sometimes kids are not able to understand their feelings or find the best way to express them. From a young age, you can help them do the same whenever you see that they are experiencing both positive and negative emotions. It is important that they express themselves as they feel instead of the opposite. For instance, many parents teach their children to be quiet and calm when they are experiencing distress or anger. This leads to confusion in children with respect to the emotions they are experiencing. You could read story books with your child and discuss the feelings of the characters and the situations in which the characters are involved.
Listen To Your Child
This is something we all are guilty of. Most of us are so busy finding faults and correcting our kids that we only see one side of the picture. We need to be more empathetic to the feelings of our kids. We need to avoid being judgmental, hear them out and offer critical advice they need.
Let Your Child Learn To Independently Handle Problems
Yes, supporting kids is important. But that doesn’t mean you jump in at every occasion and not give your child a chance to resolve issues by him/herself. If you see an issue, discuss it with your child and offer a strategy. Also, take his/her opinion on whether the solution you have suggested will work.
Spend quality time with your child
Most of us are guilty of spending time with our kids either teaching them or giving them advice. We also need to spend carefree, non-stressful time with our kids. I have made it a habit to spend at least half an hour before bedtime with my child. We give each other hugs even if we are upset with each other during the day and also talk about things not related to studies or my work.
Positive Feedback Is The Way To Go
So your child may not be academically strong but might be good at arts. He doesn’t need to be Picasso for you to praise him. Be supportive of his/her passion and encourage positive feedback. This will help your child pursue their passion with fervour and also make him/her confident.
Have Realistic Expectations From Your Child And Teach them To Have The Same
While it’s important to promote and give your child the best environment to nurture and grow, accept your child as he/she is and promote your child’s strengths. Help your child work up to his/her potential. Focus on the effort rather than the result.
They observe and learn from you and often imitate you, so always remember to portray good social behaviour when they are around. Sometimes your child may need help to develop friends and a social circle. It is important to help develop their social skills from an early age without being overbearing and intimidating.
As a parent, lay the foundation of your child’s well being, self-realisation and demonstrate appropriate emotional behaviour to nurture their emotional development and build their emotional quotient. Because in today’s day and time developing and building emotional quotient in our children is quite indispensable.